Afterbird

Afterbird. A term created by Abraham Verghese, author of "Cutting For Stone" that described a woman's afterbirth as identified by the main character who was about 5 years old at the time. Afterbird pains. Something no one, not even your doctor foreworns you about. Definition: Excruciatingly sharp contractions you experience as your uterus attempts to return to its normal size. Initially I thought something was wrong. Did I not deliver the entire afterbird? Did something else happen when the cord wrapped around little Wyatt's neck? I mentioned these pains, which nearly had me in tears, to my overly upbeat nurse who responded nonchalantly that these were to be expected and only get worse during breastfeeding and also increase in pain with every child I have (yes, we were thinking one more). Think labor. But without your sweet and compassionate friend, the epidural. There were times I came so close to lightly pushing Wyatt's head away during a feeding and transitioning him to the bottle right then and there, it was just that unbearable, even with the hospital-grade Ibuprofen and Percocet cocktail they were feverishly serving me. Imagine this addition to the existing frustration and discouragement that a new breastfeeding mother is already feeling as she tries to establish this almost always initially flawed feeding relationship with her baby. Some kind of warning would have been nice, welcome even, despite the bad news this warning bears. So here it is, ladies, afterbird pains, your fair warning, what your doctor won't tell you. Let's unpack this frightening suitcase a little further...

I honestly agonized over whether or not to breastfeed. With my first, I had actually not planned to however if I had I wouldn't have been given the opportunity. Caleb was premature and his sucking reflex had not yet developed so they were feeding him through a tube that ran through his nose and down into his stomach. I was certain that given my previous experience that Wyatt would also come early. Despite a hospitalized close call at the end of January, he made it to full term, leaving the decision to breastfeed entirely up to me. Originally, I thought that breastfeeding wasn't for me. Let's face it, up until this point, my breasts had only been employed by the hubs and now I was looking to get them another full-time job. My main concern was that I wouldn't be able to mentally separate the two and that it would be wierd. I started informally interviewing people from my family to my friends, even my boss. Most of the reports I collected had genuinely negative undertones: "I felt like I was living without a shirt on." "It hurt really bad." "I resented my husband because I was always up feeding and he couldn't help." I carefully considered these real-life "horror" stories and allowed them to rule out breastfeeding for me.

What should you expect while expecting? This book became my bible as the 12 years between my pregnancies had caused quite the understandable lapse in memory. I consulted this manual for everything and while I was flipping through it one day I came across a hefty chunk dedicated to breastfeeding. The pro's heavily outnumbered the con's and I became captivated. I soaked up all of the information that I could down to positions and techniques and let it simmer for a while.

My doctor had been probing me--no pun intended--about my intentions for breastfeeding so that she could safely prescribe a method of birth control following my delivery. Following my enlightening reading session, I informed her that I was thinking about trying to breastfeed. I had convinced myself that I would attempt it, even if only once, to see how things went and if I didn't enjoy it then I could stick to bottle feeding and at the very least say that I tried.

So I did. I was surprised that it didn't feel wierd at all but more organic than anything. The skin-to-skin contact with my baby as I was able to feed him in a way that no one ever could as he looked up at me was priceless. Those afterbird pains, while excruciating, were worth enduring for the 3 or 4 days and I'm so happy and even proud of myself for not giving up on breastfeeding because of them. The hospital lactation consultant answered all of my questions--quite a few, in fact--from whether or not my baby was getting enough nourishment even though my milk had yet to come in to how long I should expect him to feed at each breast or why it was more important to allow him to "drain" one entire breast as opposed to feeding a few minutes on each one. Whatever you do, take advantage of the free lactation consultant that your hospital will provide. Not only do they typically charge when you make appointments outside of your hospital stay but they provide a wealth of invaluable information, including hands-on demonstrations, regarding breastfeeding that truly cannot be replaced by simply reading a book.


I understand that not everyone has the same breastfeeding experience but I suppose I say all of this in case there are those of you out there who, like me, were skeptical and really agonized over the decision. Check out the photo of Wyatt at the top; that's right after a feeding and he couldn't possibly be happier! Despite all of the stories you may hear and the pains that may accompany breastfeeding, its really a decision you should make after trying it once for yourself. You might be pleasantly surprised :)